You have to do it THIS way.

“You need a band.”

“Have you tried (American Idol/X Factor/America’s Got Talent/etc)??”

“You need an image.”

“You need to stick to one genre!”

And many many more…

I love all of the advice I get, even the criticism, though it hurts at first, it’s always helpful. I love that people care enough to tell me what I should or shouldn’t do 🙂

But there just isn’t just one way to go about this crazy music thing. Look at your favorites and think about how they “made it”. Most of the time each story is different when you get down to the minor details. The only variable that remains the same is: they kept trying.

Anyway, I have NO idea what I’m doing, but I listen to the people who care about my career and I take note from the people that are further down the line from me and I rush toward opportunity (when I see it) with, as Jessica nicely put it: “aggressive faith”. Words to live by, Jess!

Something I told my son this morning as we said our prayers… God knows what’s best for you. God knows what the right answers are. If you don’t know, pray that he’ll guide your steps and make your decisions and just know that whatever you’re doing? He’s there with you. If you’re not succeeding? He’s redirecting you. Just.. Keep on walking.

And I’m pretty sure my ADD kicked in somewhere and redirected this blog post three times, but hey! Its all good.

I have to be honest.

I’m not feeling particularly awesome today, regardless of what the nametag on my desk says (it says “Hello, my name is Awesome!”).

I feel… Frumpy. Angsty. Tired. Like I’ve regressed to that 15 year old introvert that basically feels like she doesn’t fit in anywhere and never will.
I know, right?! Sooo emo!

How do I make it stop?

I wish I would wake up happy and stay happy every day! Every day, find something amazing and beautiful and inspiring that would allow me to relax and just bask in peace and wonderfulness.
But today? Well, it’s one of those “I don’t want to be here” days.

I’m sulky, dammit and I don’t want to be, so that makes me sulk more.

It’ll pass. I think I need a good hour of intense kung fu mixed with some really loud, ass kicking punk rock. Ohhh yes.

❤

EDIT:
After giving a tiny bit of thought, my mood could be a result of the following variables:
1. Over-indulgence of some pretty amazing home-made chocolate chip cookies.
2. Reading animal rights debates and related articles.
3. Watching a documentary about the US Government's continued abuse of Native lands and discussing it with my son.
(Which he replied with, might I add: “……..but it’s WRONG. That land belongs to the Natives. It belongs to US, TOO because WE’RE Native.” God, I love that boy.)

Really. It all hurts my heart.