Phillybloco makes car rides much more entertaining.
I don’t like saying “I have my son that week”…because it implies that I do not have him the next week or the week prior. It’s true. That doesn’t mean I have to like it. I feel like I should have him ALL the time. It’s been about a year and a half since this custody agreement and I’ve not completely adjusted to not having my favorite human being on the face of this earth in my care 24/7. I guess it’s sort of the same feeling a mother gets when she first drops her baby off at daycare. It just doesn’t feel natural.
It’s not natural. In a perfect world his father and I would have been perfect for each other and would have stayed together and we would have been a perfect family, but it’s not a perfect world, is it? I’m happy that my ex and I are not together anymore because we were not meant for each other. I’m happy that he is now a part of his son’s life after so many years… but I miss my boy. I get instantly sad when I drop him off. I feel guilty when he’s not around, like I’m missing out. But this is how we have to live…
I guess it is fair. I had Ethan in my care for 8 full years. His dad should share a piece of his childhood. It’s a good thing that he’s around. I used to complain because he wasn’t around. I know there are many single moms out there that do wish their child’s father wanted to be a part of their lives. This is a blessing. It’s a sacrifice and a blessing. I sacrifice those days where I don’t get to see him at all… and I’m blessed that he’s getting the experience of having a father.
I can’t wait to pick him up on Sunday.
This is a picture of Ethan when he was 3. I taught him how to test the beds in the department store 😉